Don't Get Them Mad,
You Won't Like Them When They're Mad
The expression on the face of the receptionist was so funny that Louis would have been rolling around on the floor laughing if the situation hadn't been so serious. Kyrn, being even grumpier than normal, had simply yelled behind him "find something to carry those gods be cursed twinkies in, I'll go get them", then stomped his way into the bakery with Kyri close behind. Louis, sputtering something about "wait a minute, you can't go in there!" had followed close behind.
Let's just say that two angry unicorns and one confused human made for an interesting group, considering that two of them weren't supposed to really exist ...
"Oh my god, oh my god ..." the receptionist kept muttering to herself as Kyrn tried to figure out the map of the plant that was on the wall of the reception area. "I used to dream about unicorns when I was a little girl, but I never thought they really existed! Oh my god, oh my god ..."
Kyrn was completly ignoring her, Kyri was keeping an eye out for others, and Louis was wondering how long they'd lock him up for. The best he could hope for was that they'd end up in some secret government lab that at least had good food. He'd eat well while he spent the rest of his life trying to explain what was going on.
Then the receptionist made a bad mistake ...
"Uh, why are you ignoring me? I thought unicorns were supposed to be cute and pay attention to ladies?"
If you could have found somebody with a pin they hadn't already dropped in surprise, you'd have heard it hitting the floor about now. Kyrn and Kyri both went rigid then turned to stare at the confused receptionist.
"What did you say?" asked Kyrn with a look that would have had most people calling their travel agent.
"I thought unicorns were supposed to be cute? You kinda look like ..."
The receptionist lost her voice about the same moment Kyrn reached over and grabbed her by her blouse and pulled her across the desk. "If you want a cute unicorn, you should have stayed a virgin. Once you loose your purity you end up with me instead and the only thing I need to know about you is what kind of BBQ sauce you go good with."
The receptionist did the one thing she could still manage, she fainted. Kyrn then handed her to his sister, who locked her in a nearby closet and broke off something in the lock to make sure she didn't bother them again.
"Louis, can you find the twinkies on this gods be damned map?" asked Kyrn as he turned back to look at the map. "All this thing will tell me is where I am, not where the twinkies are."
Louis looked up at the black unicorn and decided not to try to explain about the "you are here" sticker. "I'd guess they were in one of these cold storage rooms near the back of the building. They probably keep them there so they can fill orders as needed."
Kyri thought about that for a moment, then snickered to herself. "How about we place an order for 10,000 twinkies then?"
"You're kidding, right?" asked Louis.
Kyri walked over to the receptionist desk and began to search through the piles of paper scattered around on top of it. A few moments later she pulled out a wad of stuff stapled together and handed it to Louis. "That is an order, right?"
Louis looked at it and nodded, "Yeah, for a bunch of bread, HoHo's and other stuff for a local supermarket."
"Then all we need is a blank order form ..."
It took the three of them ten minutes, two busted drawers on the desk and a wide selection of curses but they had an order from the same super- market for 10,000 twinkies and some other stuff to balance the order out. Kyri, using her little known but much practiced talent for forgery, signed the order with a flourish and grinned at her brother.
To the fading sounds of somebody pounding on a closet door, the three of them then rushed back to see how their companions had done with the job of finding a truck. Louis wasn't at all sure they could pull this off, but if all else failed he'd just send the unicorns in to take the twinkies by force. After all, life in prison might be safer ...
The IH might have gotten away with everything, destroyed it's enemies, enslaved the Earth, cornered the market on twinkies. Then it made a fatal mistake.
It got Kalindra mad at it ...
Lythandi had caught Kal as she fell backwards, but before she could wonder what had happened her Klizan lept back to her feet and began to snarl in rage. "Brian?" she asked.
"Brian," replied the head of the family nas Kan as she conjured up a Velan Portable Fusion Gun and handed it to Lythandi. "I've spent too many years training that Brian to loose him to some idiot with a sugar fetish. He'd finally learned how to give me a good backrub even through all my fur, I'm not going to start over again."
Conjuring up a gun for herself, Kalindra turned and looked at Thrysten and Zen. "You want weapons or are you going in like that?"
"Going in?" asked Zen as he reformed into a bipedel form.
"Lythandi and I are going in after Brian while there is still a Brian to go in after. You can stay here if you want but I'd assumed you'd want to pull Foxeris out of there." As she spoke, she handed Lythandi a bandelero full of plasma grenades, miniature velcro Barney's and rap music cassettes. For herself, she created a vest covered with detachable pink ribbons, a half dozen pictures of 50's teen idols and a variety of shortrange anti-matter claymores.
Thrysten blinked in shock at the sight, Zen just hummed to himself in thought as bits of him shimmered and changed form.
Kalindra wasn't in a mood to wait, so she pulled a crowbar out of thin air and pried the inter-dimensional rip open a little wider. Then, grabbing Lythandi by the paw, she jumped into the rip with a flair of actinic light.
"Hey you!" yelled Kalindra as she buried the crowbar in the nearest tentacle. "Get your slimy hands off my mate, I'm the only one that's allowed to abuse him like that!"
Then both vixens opened fire ...